Written by Horatio O’Shea
There is a fundamental misunderstanding of “Self-Care”. A lot of the time we believe is self-care” is actually self-soothing, temporarily numbing discomfort rather than addressing the root causes.
Selfcare is an act of evolution, a deliberate investment in your current self that expands your capacity. It’s the conscious cultivation of practices that enhance your resilience, support your values, and promote long-term psychological, emotional and physical wellbeing. True selfcare requires awareness, reflection, connection, and sometimes temporary discomfort for lasting benefit.
Self-soothing, conversely, functions as an act of resolution, a response to a psychological, emotional, or physical distress that alleviates discomfort. It’s your nervous system’s way of returning to baseline after activation.
Implementing intentional selfcare requires understanding that both self-soothing and selfcare are required: calming the nervous system and aligning resources to support our needs. A baseline Intentional Selfcare plan includes:
Reflection Practices: Regular journaling and mindfulness practices help in mapping emotions and responses, allowing you to recognise impact and aligns resources to support specific needs. These practices contribute to deeper self-awareness.
Community and Connection: Engaging in social activities such as supportive groups or contributing to community initiatives removes isolation and normalises our experience.
Skill Development: Activities that challenge personal growth demonstrating that selfcare is not always restful but can be invigorating and constructive.
Both are vital, the difference lies not in choosing one over the other, but in knowing which serves your deepest needs in each moment.